Sunday, November 24, 2013

A week of challenges!

I am getting excited about Thanksgiving!  I hope that you guys are lucky enough to be looking forward to it rather then dreading it!  After all, it is supposed to be a day for family and giving thanks.  And that's what I plan to do.

So I talked about how rattled I get when it comes to changes in my routine.  And after an incredibly stressful and emotional week, I found myself - by my own choice - facing changes to my routine over the weekend.

Yesterday, Marc and I worked out as we always do on Saturday mornings and then went to a small and ultimately crappy local craft show.  We then hit the grocery store to make sure that I had everything that I am going to make for Thanksgiving so I won't have to stop after work this week.  

When we got home there was plenty of time for us to do a second workout.  But I felt edgy and unsettled.  I used the computer and paced a little.  And then - feel free to GASP - I took a bubble bath.  I don't talk much on here about the importance of rest.  That's because I'm terrible at it.  But I know that it is important to listen to your body - and yesterday it was telling me to chill.  And I was almost able to do it completely.

As a funny aside, I want to tell you something, but it falls into the WAY TMI file - so brace yourself!  When we built the addition onto our house in 2005 we built a large master bed and bath and I wanted to make sure we had a deluxe jacuzzi tub.  When Marc and I used to take a bath together we were squished and tried to find a position where we were both comfortable.  I also used to worry that with both of us in there that we would weigh too much and actually BREAK the tub and fall through into the basement.  Yesterday, both of us were in there and I realized that the 2 of us together weigh LESS than I used to weigh when I was in there MYSELF!!!  AND, there was plenty of room for both of us to get into a totally comfortable position and relax!

So, yes, I actually allowed myself to relax instead of working out and I only felt a little guilty.

I woke up this morning knowing that I was scheduled to do my long run.  The sun was beautifully bright and as I looked out the window I could see the trees telling me that there was only a light breeze.  Yay!

And then I went out to the computer room and saw Marc coming in from opening the chicken coop.  His face was bright red and he was shaking his hands and said that the outside water was frozen.  I checked and the temperature was 6 degrees!!  The thought of running in that was horrible.  I decided to choose the lesser of 2 hells and told Marc my plan would be to run on the treadmill in the afternoon while watching football.

We then headed over to my mother's house to drop off presents for the relatives as she is heading out to their house for Thanksgiving and I won't have to mail the gifts since she can take them.  We made a stop at Walmart - I was FILLED with anxiety.  Stupid?  Yup.  My anxiety came from being out of my routine - Sunday I run in the morning.  And I hadn't.  My trip to Walmart ended up with me going APESHIT on a cashier.  I mean, she was in the wrong, but I may have ever so slightly over-reacted.

But then I hit the treadmill and ran 13.12 miles.  And that restored the world to it's upright and locked position and I feel good.  Only 3 days of work this week and then the holiday season starts!!  

I am almost exactly 1 year and 4 months into maintenance and I continue to evolve and challenge my way of thinking.  I know that I am wildly imperfect and sound crazy at times, so thanks everyone for bearing with me.  I try to be as real as I can - I don't know that anyone else "gets it" but I hope it is useful for you!

Today I am thankful for the luxury of being able to make my own choices and to explore different ways of living my life.

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