You would think I'd be excited, but I'm somewhat melancholy today. I'm all up in my head worrying that the results won't be worth it. Won't be worth the time off from exercising, the pain, the money.
I did my last run at lunch today. Weather was beautiful and I ran a fast pace. I keep thinking that when I'm finally cleared to run again, it will be like completely starting over. I'm also so worried of gaining weight back while I'm recuperating and what if that just makes me lose what I've worked so hard for and I gain a bunch back?
Hopefully this is a short lived pity party and by tomorrow I'm excited so that I go in with a good attitude.
I did have one interesting thing happen today - a prominent member of Watertown government - who I frequently see walking to lunch while I'm running, but have never spoken a word to - flagged me down on my run. She said that she has been seeing me running since last year and she just needed to tell me how awesome I look and how amazing my weight loss has been. It was really nice of her!
I am so inspired by your journey and wish you joy today TUES as you head off to your surgrey!All of us at 3fc are thinking of you deva
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine how you must feel. Scared and excited all at the same time!!! You have come so far, might as well see this through, Right!!! It will be worth it, I am sure of it!
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't worry about the weight coming back. You have been committed to this for so long. Most surgeries they hardly let you wake up, nevermind lay around for weeks on end. I bet that you will find after the worst of it you will be able to walk. Even if it starts out at a slow pace, you are still moving !!!
Good Luck tomorrow and update as soon as you feel well enough!! Duke and Spike have their paws crossed for you too!