I knew how it was going to go today. I needed to see the doc for my annual appointment. A new doc who I had never met before. Every time I get a doctor, he or she moves away. I'm beginning to get a bit paranoid.
I went to the office and the nurse called me back and the first thing that they almost always do is put you on the scale. I felt the old feeling of shame and dread.
I am so fucking discouraged and embarrassed. It's bad. Really really bad.
Blood pressure was good. Nurse, incredibly nice. Then comes in the doc. Young, HOT AS HELL, smart and fit. He wants me to get a mammogram. And lab work.
He mentions my "family history" many many many times. I can see the future. My cholesterol is going to be high. Especially since I'm gained so much weight. And he's going to want me to take meds. Especially since this young hot doc shared with me that he takes statins because his cholesterol is high due to his own family history.
He tells me he is not concerned at all about my weight. I tell him I am!!! He tells me the winter has been horrible. It will get better, I can lose it easily. He tells me he knows I am concerned, that I am beating myself up but I just need to get my eating back on track.
Oh, is that all I have to do?