Saturday, May 31, 2014

Closing the door on May 2014.

We have arrived at the last day of May.  First off, I want to thank everyone who sent me good vibes knowing that I was crashing and burning a bit the last few days.

I know that you will find this completely shocking - NOT!  But I can tend to be a little bit of a hysteric.  Turns out I was making a gigantic mountain out of a very small molehill.  I had created a whole scenario of disaster which didn't materialize.  So I am good.

Where do I stand this last day of May?  Marc and I slept in the latest we have slept in (ok we weren't sleeping, but TMI!!) in months and months.  We are planning on going on a hiking adventure today.  We are as solid I think as we have ever been and for that I am supremely thankful!

Exercise - I gotta admit, I have fallen off the wagon hard.  Since the half-marathon I have not been running as much as usual and have lost my desire.  I have tried to offer all kinds of rationalizations - like "I'm just taking it easy on my Achilles" but that - like all other excuses - is bullshit.  My lifting sessions have also felt somewhat anemic.  I have been very active, but not as focused.  I plan to re-focus on that - we'll see how my long run goes tomorrow!

Weight - I weighed in this morning at 121.0.  That 1 pound above my red line and at least 3 pounds from where I would like to be.  And that's been the consistent pattern throughout May.  And somehow - I just can't bring myself to care.  I feel like I should care.  But I just don't.  So have I resigned myself to a higher weight?  Maybe?  Does that make me a failure?

And where do the other members of the family stand?

I continue to work on Chakotay's weight - which I'm measuring him, not weighing him.  He is slowwwwwwly losing some inches.  Now that we are able to walk and hike more, that should get better.

The baby chicks?  I didn't share this with you guys because it was SO horrible and we'd never had it happen before.  But a couple of days after we moved the baby chicks into the coop, the older hens attacked one of the babies.  They pecked off a whole bunch of her feathers and then the skin on her skull down to the BONE.  It was horrific and the baby ended up dying.  A lot of people who have had chickens insist to me that the baby must have been sick - even though she seemed fine - and the other hens instinctually knew it and got rid of her.

At any rate, what's done is done.  The other 7 are doing great and there have been no more incidents.  The older hens are laying away so we are having our fresh eggs and selling some by the road. 

I still have an itch.  That itch for a change.  The desire to take a risk and alter my path.  But overall, heading into not just a new month, but a new year of my life, I am feeling surprisingly positive and optimistic.

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