Monday, November 9, 2015

Bottle it up, please!

Wow! You can’t buy these type of days! I told you guys that I am trying to take things one day at a time, right?

Today was a busy morning and before I knew it, lunch time was here. It was a cool and beautifully bright sunny day. Marc and I had taken the dogs to a local trail and ran with them yesterday. I normally don’t run 3 days in a row, but with it being such a beautiful day and the weather forecast saying that the rest of the week is going to be miserable, I knew I should get out and run.

Sometimes I take my first few steps and know that the whole run is going to suck - that every 1/4 mile is going to be a fight. And then sometimes a little miracle happens. Sometimes I take my first few steps and it’s like the mythical Hermes, it feels like I have little wings attached to my feet.


Today was one of those days.

I felt strong and calm and then I passed the local pizza shop. I always pass there, and inevitably I feel jealous of the people sitting in there, eating their huge pieces of pizza and watching me run by. Sometimes I try to tell myself that I am superior to them to make myself feel better.

Today was different. Today I looked in at them and I wasn’t even a bit jealous. I thought about when I used to go out to lunch. It would consist of sucking down a couple pieces of pizza. Or I would go to TGI Fridays and have their all you can eat lunch where I would eat a few bowls of broccoli cheddar soup and about 1 billion breadsticks. And I would return to work feeling heavy and tired. I would be sluggish all afternoon - half in a carb-induced food coma, and I would just count the minutes until I could go home.

I realized that - weight aside - it was not pleasant. I thought about how I feel now when I get back to work after running or another exercise. I sit at my desk eating my healthy lunch while returning phone calls and doing paperwork and am I energized instead of lethargic. I am way more productive and in better spirits now than when I used to eat fast food during lunch.

I had been planning on running 3-4 miles. But I felt so good I just kept going and I got in 6 miles. I wasn’t proud of myself and I didn’t feel sorry for myself. I just felt good. I’m not exactly where I want to be, but I’m a hell of lot better than that girl of the past.

Tomorrow, well we all know how that goes. Tomorrow I could fall into a vat of self-pity and loathing. But JUST FOR TODAY I will relish how I feel.


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