I don’t know how many people will see this post – after all, it’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything and probably most people – who even cared to check – have given up.
I gave up. Completely.
I lost any and all hope. It was hit after hit after hit in 2016, and it seemed like I could never get my feet under me.
For those of you who know me, I love Christmas. And this year, I was in such a deep, dark depression that I didn’t decorate. No tree, no lights, no nothing. Instead I curled up on the couch and cried while Marc stood there baffled and helpless wondering what the hell was wrong with me.
And that’s just it – most of the drama was entirely in my own head. But that being a FACT and even KNOWING how ridiculous it was didn’t make it go away.
I’d like to tell you that things are better, and that I have a ton of hope for the New Year. But I also don’t want to blow smoke up anyone’s ass.
I sit here having gained a lot of weight and I don’t have any real sense that I can get it together. But obviously if I’m taking the time to write this I haven’t completely abandoned hope that 2017 can and will be better.
One bright spot? For those of you who don’t also look at my Facebook page – I have news!
A new puppy!
He is a sweet, mischievous, reverse brindle Boxer that we brought home on 12/23 at 8 weeks old. He is helping to heal my heart and soul….
So am I back? No promises… but I hope I am back in many ways…
Hi I just wanted to say that I wondered what happened to you. I have been reading your blog for awhile but I don't comment very often. I struggle with my weight too and finding any motivation to do anything about it. I look at each new year as hopeful and even if I can't figure out anything but maintaining where I am is ok for me. Hang in there and I hope your new dog brings you joy.
ReplyDeleteYou will get it back. You have pushed yourself hard for soooo long.....its bound to push back.
ReplyDeleteLike you said it's a good sign you are posting YOU have not given up.
I am so happy about your new puppy,they DO help heal a broken heart.
Thinking of you Jen!
A better year ahead!
Gayle
Yep, I was concerned about your demise. Good to see you're still kicking. And that puppy! Squeeeeee!! There cannot be anything better to heal a heart that a darling puppy!
ReplyDeleteTake a deep breath and face 2017 head on. As your background says, it's a fresh new year!